Vows

Wedding celebration May 26th. These are my vows:

I was never going to get married. There is no one person I had met in my adult life that would make my world bigger instead of smaller. No one who would, or could grow with me, challenge me more than I could challenge myself. My source of growth and change always came from within me. Except when it came to you.

11 years ago, right around this time, we broke each others’ hearts.

That created a void I gave up trying to fill. And a little while after my surrender, guess who came back into my life?

We didn’t know it, but we were waiting for each other.

And I’m so grateful we have had the last 11 years apart to live, to learn, to make mistakes and come to each other now having learned one or two important lessons.

Now we’re ready to make some more, learn new lessons, to grow together, and take care of each other in the process.

I, like you, Jonathan, crave challenge.

Challenging each other, we’ve already proven well we can do. And I don’t expect anything less from either of us.

That the world will present us with challenges to face, is a certainty.

To reconcile, to communicate, to always remain open to one another in the face of these, is a harder task.

We’ve proven unfailingly, that we can do that, too…

And I promise to continue.

To always see you through to other side of a challenge, no matter how great or small

Because you and I together makes that possible

That feeling of limitless possibility with you scares the crap out of me sometimes.

It’s a paradox to feel that you, Jonathan, deserve more than any human could ever give, yet you’ve chosen me to give it to you.

I am marrying you, Jonathan, for who you are today, and who I know you will be,

For what you see in me today, and who I will, with your help become.

Because you reinforce and help me see what’s best in me

And I have not a single doubt that you will do this as long as we are in each other’s lives.

So I can do no less but to promise to do the same for you.

And I do.

Your love and commitment, and the support of our family and friends, are the most precious gifts we could ever receive in this life.

For years after we parted ways 11 years ago, I had always looked back and remembered how strong our love was, thinking that it was just naivety, the folly of youth, that made me think I had really understood love.

I never felt anything like that since then, until we found each other again.

And I know now that I did understand it.

I understood it because you were the one then, as you have always been

Thank you for reminding me, after 11 years, what love really is. Thank you for always keeping me warm, thank you taking care of my heart, and giving me yours to do the same.

Jonathan, I love you.